As summer camp professionals, we’ve all experienced those unexpected moments when a camper or staff member raises a comment or question that catches us off guard. It could be related to a sensitive or controversial topic that seeps into the “bubble” of camp, such as discussions about racial injustice, gender identity, or climate change. While initially disorienting, these moments provide valuable opportunities for growth and learning for both our camp community and ourselves.

When faced with such situations, it’s natural to experience a range of reactions. We may find ourselves wondering what is happening, struggling to understand the underlying message behind the camper’s or staff member’s words. This disorientation can be unsettling, disrupting the flow of our planned activities or discussions.

Moreover, the intensity of emotions expressed in these moments can be overwhelming. We may feel a surge of empathy, sadness, or frustration as we grapple with the camper’s or staff member’s feelings. In some cases, we may even feel unsure of how to navigate the situation or provide appropriate support.

When faced with unexpected moments triggered by comments or actions from campers or staff, our responses are often deeply connected to our identities, shaped by our values, beliefs, and experiences. For example, imagine a scenario where a camper raises a question about racial injustice, a topic deeply ingrained in current controversial events. As a camp professional, my response may be informed by my identity as someone who values social justice and equality. I may feel a strong sense of empathy toward the camper’s concerns, given my personal experiences or beliefs about racial equity. Conversely, if a staff member expresses a dissenting opinion on climate change, another sensitive topic, my response might be influenced by my identity as an environmental advocate. I may feel a heightened sense of urgency to address misinformation or challenge alternative viewpoints, driven by my commitment to environmental stewardship.

In both scenarios, my identity shapes how I navigate these difficult conversations. Whether it’s affirming their willingness to engage, acknowledging their perspectives, or providing additional information, my response is guided by my values and experiences. I may also assess their response and my own reactions, considering how my identity influences the dynamics of the conversation.

Ultimately, by recognizing the impact of our identities on our responses, we can approach difficult conversations with empathy, openness, and a commitment to creating a safe and inclusive environment at summer camp. This awareness allows us to foster mutual understanding, respect, and growth among campers and staff, even in the face of challenging topics from the outside world.

In navigating these moments, it’s essential to prioritize the well-being of our campers and staff. Feeling unsafe, either emotionally or physically, can heighten our instinct to protect ourselves and those around us from potential harm. However, it’s crucial to approach these situations with empathy, openness, and a willingness to listen.

So, how do we effectively respond to unexpected moments at camp? First and foremost, we must create space for open dialogue and reflection. Encourage campers and staff to share their thoughts, feelings, and questions in a supportive and nonjudgmental environment. Find a way to validate or remain curious about their experiences and perspectives, even if they differ from our own.

Straight A’s for Facilitating Crucial Conversations

Summer camp professionals can apply the Straight A’s from Facing History to navigate complex conversations about controversial events that seep into the camp bubble from the outside world (Goodman, 2023):

1. Affirm: Begin by affirming and appreciating people’s willingness to engage in conversation. Use phrases like “I’m glad you brought that up” or “I’m glad we have the opportunity to talk about this” to create a supportive atmosphere.
2. Acknowledge: Ensure that individuals feel heard and understood by acknowledging what they are saying. Paraphrase their words and feelings to demonstrate active listening. Use statements like “It sounds like you feel . . . ” or “So from your perspective . . . ” to reflect their viewpoint.
3. Ask: Ask open-ended questions to better understand their behavior, feelings, and perspectives. Be open and curious, and watch your tone to maintain a nonjudgmental approach. Continue to explore until they feel heard, using prompts like “Can you tell me more about what you mean by that?” or “What experiences have led you to that belief?”
4. Add: Relate to their perspective and then offer additional information or alternative viewpoints. Connect with what they are saying, and then broaden their perspective by sharing your experiences, information, or historical/social/political context. Challenge misinformation respectfully to encourage critical thinking.
5. Assess and address: Assess their response and notice their body language to gauge their comfort level. Reflect on your own internal and external responses to ensure effective communication. Use prompts like “I’m wondering what you’re thinking/feeling right now?” or “You look . . . ” to address any tension or confusion. Decide on the best response based on the situation.
6. Appreciate: Conclude the conversation by appreciating their willingness to engage and share their thoughts/feelings. Express gratitude for their openness and indicate any follow-up actions, such as sharing resources or continuing the conversation at a later time. Use phrases like “Thank you for taking the time to talk with me” or “I appreciate your willingness to hear my perspective.”

By applying these steps, you can create a supportive environment for navigating complex conversations about controversial events, fostering mutual understanding, respect, and growth among campers and staff.

It’s important to take time to listen actively and empathetically. Seek to understand the underlying emotions and motivations behind the camper’s or staff member’s words. Reflect on how your own identity and experiences may influence your response, and consider how you can use this awareness to support them effectively.

Finally, empower campers and staff to be active participants in finding solutions and addressing concerns. Collaborate with them to explore potential next steps and strategies for navigating similar situations in the future. By fostering a culture of mutual respect, empathy, and growth, we can transform unexpected moments into powerful opportunities for learning and connection at summer camp.

Meeting the Moment

Let’s imagine a scenario where we gather in a program area. The excitement and anticipation are palpable, with the campers buzzing about a topic that’s been making headlines lately. This subject is close to our hearts, something we’ve grappled with personally and professionally.

As the chatter grows louder and all eyes turn to us, we feel a mix of emotions — nervousness, excitement, and a sense of responsibility. The campers are looking to us for guidance and understanding, and we know our response will shape the tone of the conversation.

On one hand, we’re apprehensive about delving into such a sensitive topic. We worry about saying the wrong thing or unintentionally alienating campers who may have differing opinions. We also don’t want the conversation to escalate and potentially tailspin into a shouting match. On the other hand, we also recognize the importance of fostering open dialogue and creating a safe space for campers to express themselves.

Taking a deep breath, we remind ourselves of the values that guide us as camp professionals — empathy, inclusivity, and respect for diverse perspectives. We know that stifling the conversation could lead to disappointment and frustration among the campers, so we decide to embrace the opportunity for meaningful dialogue.

With a calm and steady voice, we acknowledge the campers’ curiosity and express our gratitude for their willingness to engage in discussion. We encourage them to share their thoughts and feelings openly, while probing them to envision how someone with the opposite viewpoint might see the situation.

Throughout the conversation, we strive to listen actively and empathetically, ensuring that every camper feels heard and respected. We ask open-ended questions to deepen everyone’s understanding of the topic and remain neutral in our tone.

As the dialogue unfolds, we remain mindful of our role as facilitators, guiding the conversation while also allowing space for campers to lead. We challenge misinformation respectfully and provide additional context when necessary, always with the goal of promoting critical thinking and mutual understanding.

By the end of the discussion, we feel a sense of pride in the campers’ willingness to engage thoughtfully and respectfully with a challenging topic. While there may still be differences of opinion, we know that we’ve created a space where campers feel valued, respected, and empowered to speak their truth. And as we wrap up the conversation, we’re filled with hope for the future of our camp community — a future built on empathy, inclusivity, and a shared commitment to learning and growth.

The Caveat

Not every comment or topic will warrant this communal approach. When there are instances of blatant discrimination, hate speech, bullying, and fear mongering, the sanctity of the camp community has been violated, and the offending party needs an individualized conversation and response. The goal is not to ostracize them from the community, but to remain curious while making it clear that the language used is unacceptable and antithetical to the camp’s values and beliefs.

If it’s the first time you’ve heard the camper or staff member say something bigoted or discriminatory, it’s possible they’re operating from a space of ignorance that requires education. In this case, broadening their understanding is much more powerful than leaning on a punitive response. Keeping in mind that intention does not always equal impact, it’s important to prepare the offending party to have a conversation to repair harm when necessary. Trained staff members can mediate this restorative conversation as a powerful signal of connection, unity, and inclusion at camp.

If there’s a pattern of actions and language violating the camp community, however, there could be a misalignment in values and beliefs that requires parental intervention and removal from the camp community. This is never the ideal, but there are times this extreme measure is warranted.

We intentionally place the word “difficult” in quotation marks when referencing conversations that are often uncomfortable, jarring, and destabilizing. These conversations can feel like conflict in all its negative connotations, but West African writer and elder Malidoma Patrice Somé offers an alternate interpretation worth considering: “Conflict is the spirit of the relationship asking itself to deepen.” In our work, we encourage everyone to embrace these candid, essential conversations. They do not have to be “difficult” at all, especially when you anticipate them, practice potential responses, and reflect on the strengths and limitations of each response pathway. These “difficult” conversations can indeed be opportunities to deepen our relationships with others, which inherently strengthens our communities.

Photo courtesy of Hoosier Burn Camp, Battleground, IN.

References

Goodman, D. (2023, September 26). Straight A’s for Facilitating Crucial Conversations. Facing History & Ourselves. facinghistory.org/resource-library/straight-facilitating-crucial-conversations

Zellars, R. (2023, February 17). Leadership series: Embodied leadership for anti-racism, equity, and inclusion. Canada School of Public Service. csps-efpc.gc.ca/video/leadership-series/embodied-leadership-eng.aspx#transcript

Lance W. Ozier, EdD, has been on the faculty of The City University of New York since 2009, having also taught courses at Teachers College, Columbia University. Born and raised on a Georgia farm, he now lives in New York and has taught and worked in Atlanta and NYC classrooms for over 20 years. Lance received a Hedley S. Dimock Award in 2015 and also served on the American Camp Association’s Research Advisory Committee.

Chanika R. Perry, EdD, is the director of education programs at Hands On Atlanta. She is also an adjunct professor in the SPA program at Teachers College, Columbia University. Prior to these roles, she was a high school principal in Atlanta. She has been involved in the fields of youth development and education for over 20 years, mostly in NYC and Atlanta.

Chanika and Lance have been friends for over 20 years, worked together at Project Morry for over a decade, and continue to enjoy working together as cofounders of conversationforward.org.